An urban missile

Before you read this entry, click play on this youtube video and enjoy the sounds of Grizzly Bear.  This is a potentially life altering track, do not miss it. This video is of the movie Seven and has nothing to do with the music, aside from the fact that whomever posted this montage on youtube.com thought it went together.  



And now....that you have that playing in the background.... onto urban missiles.........




I don't know how many of you smoke.  Well that's not entirely true.  I know exactly how many of the 4 people that read this blog smoke.  But you don't blog for the blog you have.  You blog for the blog you want ;) 

Since none of you do, you might not know about throwing an atomic missile.  You see smoking turns you into a monster.  A cigarette flicking fire tossing 500 pound gorilla in the room is what you become.  Smoking cigarettes numbs your mind to the fact that they're even on fire.  You soon forget it as the addiction overtakes your common sense.  And after a while you don't even notice what you're smoking around.  Or even care for that matter, in any way. 

So here's how it goes down.  You're smoking on your father's oil rig in Houston Texas....  Two guys who have just been in gigantic oil spills come running on your position.  Without even thinking you throw your cigarette directly at the gentleman and they burst into flames....causing company ending law suits.... 

Ok it never goes down that way.  If it did you might start to care about where you toss your flaming step children.  But for some reason cigarettes, I am human enough to report, never blow stuff up. 

I don't know why they don't, but I have certainly seen enough field tests to know they will not ignite anything.  I have, with wind guided precision, flicked a lit cigarette into a carburetor this morning.  some twenty minutes ago mind you; having yet to hear an explosion.   

I have also flicked my cigarette fire starters into especially dry forests and have yet to cause damage or harm to one.  One time a lit cig fell right out of my mouth onto a wooden casket that I had just personally spilled alcohol on, and.... nothing.  Well not exactly nothing; everyone got to see me run and cover. 

I had a step grandmother who had a fire in her apartment one time when I was a child.  I'm starting to think that the adults in my life just told me a cigarette started the fire, so I wouldn't consider smoking.  

Seriously I have launched so many horrendous urban missiles that my right to smoke should be revoked.  Seriously who smokes near a paper factory on a windy day?  Who has put a cigarette out on his great grandmother's oxygen tank?  Who picks up his hair spray factory girlfriend at work chiefing?  

I do.  The smoker.  The dirty all powerful me. It's disheartening really to see every butt you toss, regardless of aim, end up in a dry leaf pile.